What is Love?

Oh baby, don't hurt me.

Don't hurt me no more...

Just kidding.

As I am on the final stretch of my latest all-nighter doing studio related stuff, I remember that I knew this would happen if I wanted to do architecture. I want to be an architect. Is it something that I love? Not really. But it's something that I can see myself doing and enjoying for the most part. Why architecture and not civil engineering? I don't know really. Growing up I have been saturated with all the science and math and I kind of just didn't want to keep dealing with that consistently as much. I am good at science and math and believe that it is much more useful and practical, but I couldn't picture myself doing that all the time. I love math and science, but I wouldn't enjoy it if that was all that I did. Funny how that works out.

People often tell me to pursue what I love and love what I do. I agree with this. Often times, people think this is synonymous with loving my hypothetical future job that I have--which I disagree with. I personally think that if a person takes things s/he truly loves and make it his/her job, s/he will eventually end up not loving it. It will begin to end up being somewhat of a routine--something that that person has to do as opposed to something that person wants to do.

This is why I would never want to be an aspiring musician or a professional photographer or an engineer or a scientist. I love photography; I love playing guitar; I love math and science. I would prefer to keep it that way because I am happiest when I am doing photography and/or music related things. Architecture just seemed to be the perfect balance between the logic and structure of engineering and the creativity outlet of designing while still keeping me from ending up hating photography or playing the guitar or doing countless calculations.

I apologize if you were expecting me to write about love and relationships and what not. Maybe I will save that for next time.

Dead Week is Dead

Well, there is no official dead week here at Georgia Tech anymore. Oh well. This semester needs to end. Not in two weeks...now. It has been a tiring and exhausting semester on all levels and I just need it to be over with. I am tired. I am tired with school, tired with people, tired with life in general.

I have tried to be more social this past school year. At least a lot more out of my comfort zone in terms of socializing with people. It has been very draining and it just really isn't my thing. At times, I have recently resorted back to my old self and people here have sometimes noticed. I usually mask it under the reason that I have been lacking sleep and am very tired--which is true on the surface. However, the real reason is that I am just tired of socializing and have simply returned to normal. I guess this would explain why I don't have very many friends and I don't make friends very easily. I am much more comfortable being in the background of everything and just simply observing people. It really is a lot more interesting than wasting time talking with people. I tend to keep my observations to myself though.

It takes me a very long time to actually feel comfortable around anyone and it usually takes other people to actually remember who I am. I have found myself introducing myself to the same people for a few weeks when I only see them once a week. It has gotten a bit annoying, but it's not that surprising that it happens. I have always thought that I would make a good spy because I am a very forgettable person. People just don't remember me easily for some reason. I guess that it still holds true. Oh well.

The competitiveness of some people in studio disgusts me.